Rinse and repeat

Gargling is a popular pastime in Japan. This restroom even has a "gargle device" installed.

Traffic advisory

Despite evidence to the contrary, Japanese people believe that earthquakes are caused by a giant catfish.

Spread 'Em

This is a manners poster. A what!? Yes, I understand your reaction. It is probably much like those punctuation marks. !?

You may have heard that Japanese people are so well-mannered. So polite. Etc. Well if that was true, there would be no need for these kinds of manner posters all over the subway.

This particular poster annoys me more than most. The question it asks in Japanese is "Why are your legs spread?" You may not be as quick as me to notice, but that's a man sitting there. A MAN.

Question answered.

Submarine alley

Help me solve this mystery. This sign is one of a couple placed near my house where there are many narrow streets. The sign says there are alleyways ahead, so watch out for bicycles and children suddenly darting out.

If you look closer, there is a silhouette of what appears to be a submarine.Both signs have it.

What's the meaning of the submarine?

Brown Line Express

Don't you hate it when you're riding to work on the subway and you suddenly have a diarrhea attack? Here's an ad for anti-crap-your-pants medicine called "Stopper."

I like how the bottom of the ad directs people to download a toilet locater app for their smartphone. From my experience, it seems more people here vomit on train cars and platforms than blow a gasket, so they really should be marketing barf bags instead.

Body by Bespin

Here is a woman encased in carbonite hanging on a wall outside a drinking establishment in Hiroshima. Ever since the intergalactic gangster Jabba the Hutt hung the frozen Han Solo up in his palace, it's been a popular way for gangsters in Japan to deal with troublemakers. She most likely worked as a hostess in one of the many pubs sprinkled across this tiny nation. She probably didn't sell enough champagne or enough of herself to customers to make the boss happy. Don't feel too sorry for her. . she should be perfectly fine. If she survived the freezing process, that is.

Peek-a-boo

This is not an uncommon sight in Tokyo. Cars are often too big for garages. Or is it the other way around? There's something kind of cute about this. Like the way a kid might hide behind a curtain when playing hide-and-seek, and not realize that his feet are sticking out from underneath.

Working girls

Don't let those colorful, sexy silhouettes fool you. This is not a poster for a new Charlie's Angels movie. This is a sign for Girls Office Tokyo, an OL-style maid cafe and bar. OL stands for "office lady," a term used for female staff who do clerical work. It's a more modern take on the maid cafes that started years ago in Akihabara and are now all over the country. (I just saw one on my recent trip to Hiroshima.) There are maid cafes where the staff wears French maid outfits, rabbit ears, and even traditional Japanese kimono. I guess someone thought those costumes were too fantastical or realized that some men fantasize about the women in their offices. In many Japanese companies, OLs wear uniforms (that means skirts). I went out with an OL on a date once, and she wore her uniform because she thought I'd be turned on by it. Wrong. Touching the stiff material (polyester?) just made me think of old people in a hospital.

Avengers' acidophilus

The Avengers Assemble has opened in Japan. Back in May, I saw it in the U.S., where it was just called The Avengers. In addition to the plain movie title there, I also had to be content with boring yogurt flavors. Not in Japan, the land that gave us Lipovitan! Here I can eat Energy Yogurt that is fortified with royal jelly and vitamin B. Sorry, Iron Man, but it's not fortified with iron. Its sour flavor, though, might make anyone except the Hulk turn green. Tastes like Oronamin C gone rancid.

Fembot floorshow

Last Saturday night I checked out the new Robot Restaurant in Shinjuku with some friends. Be warned, though. . it's more of a show than a restaurant. All you get for 3000 yen is an unappealing cold bento box (I've had better convenience store bentos) and some drinks. But the flashing lights, silicone in bikinis, and giant mannequins on wheels sort of make up for it. Do not bring your epileptic friends unless you want to see them on the floor, too.